Free Advice #6

Hi Jessica,

I am all for a sisterhood of intelligent, independent, beautiful, strong women. That being said, I am not for girl competition. A friendship with a good friend and collaborator is quickly breaking down and I hope it can be fixed. Healthy and productive art competition has turned into unhealthy and painful boy and life and style competition. I used to be flattered that she respected my art work so much to borrow conceptual/aesthetic themes from me but now that she is hooking up with my boy's best friend it feels like I am being sucked dry.

I am to blame too and have been acting weird and defensive -- pretty much like a 5 year-old who doesn't want to share her toys. I have tried to talk to her about it but it is really hard to sugar coat "Get out of my mirror so I can see." It just makes me sad because I am retreating to exclusively male friends because the only problems that arise with them are love ones and that seems much easier!

Anonymous


Dear Anonymous,

This situation is such a hard one for so many reasons. The first, obviously, being that it seems that you don't want to have these weird feelings but they are seemingly uncontrollable. No one want to feel jealous and distrustful and defensive. We just let it happen to us and most of the time its totally deep seated and subconscious. Secondly, female relationships are one of the most mysterious things in life, period. I would say I have pretty amazing close female friends, but I have also only recently made them/become closer to them. I'm new at this.

Okay.. art and boys: the two most sensitive topics of life. The best thing to do in these sorts of situations is to ignore what is going on and essentially not let it get to you. You just can't. You will end up spending more time worrying about this girl lifting your ideas than making new ones and focusing on the strength of your own work. If you are unable to let it slide--or her antics become so obvious other people start to notice and point it out to you, you can either confront her or slowly disassociate yourself from her. I know the latter seems pretty drastic--but it doesn't have to be. You two can even just take a break. I know I've found in my own life that I just can't be around people who bring me down because its usually a mutual thing. In fact, I recently came up with this pseduo-mantra:

I will no longer surround myself--in real life, on the internet, etc with any single person or group of people that makes me feel less of myself in any way

I will only surround myself by positive people who I have mutually uplifting interactions with

So far its worked like a charm. I mean, I do feel some regret about some people I have chosen to remove from my life--but I have also been so much happier. Its important to remember that people change (even in short periods of time) and you can always been friends again in the future. Nothing is impossible. Also, I don't think you should avoid all female friends just because of this one girl, though. And if you and this girl are really good friends--nothing is too taboo to talk about. You just need to calm down a bit and let what you want to say to her sit in your mind for awhile.. and imagine if someone was saying the same things to you. I'm sure she feels that you have been acting weird towards her lately if she's receptive at all and thus, she might be defensive. Good luck!


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Dear Jessica,

I graduated from Graphic Design just over year ago. As I don't have a permanent job in design/illustration and want a change of scenery (feeling very uninspired at the moment), I plan on traveling to London then stay in Spain for a while to focus on my work and become a little more independent.What do you suggest is the best way for someone who has had hardly any professional experience, to approach studios or promote your work in a city/country where you have no contacts? Also, did you find it difficult to find work in Sweden or had you already had some jobs lined up before you left?

Also, I mainly do Illustration but don't like to stick to one particular style as I like experimenting with various mediums. I have read articles and advice from various illustrators who suggest that it is best to have a solid style because clients hire you for a particular 'look' that would suit their brief. What are your thought on this?

Anonymous


Dear Anonymous,

I've never really done commercial illustration and have only moved to a new city for school, so I felt kind of at a loss with this question. However, I asked my talented friend / now guest blogger Phillip Nessen of Sparrow v Swallow for some help. I thought he would only give me a few pointers, but instead he wrote this beautiful, complete answer that I can't think of anything to add to:

"My experience with illustration is in the American illustration market. So, this advice might be meaningless wherever you end up. I have heard that in some parts of Europe, at least in the past, it has been difficult to be commissioned to do illustration work if you have not yet been published before. It's a weird situation because you need experience to be published, but you need to be published to get experience. This has not been the case in my experience, though.

One of the nice things about being an illustrator is that you don't need to live in the same city as your clients. A simple way to get started, if you are confident in your work, is create a promotional package or a postcard mailing that features your work and contact information. Find magazines where you think your work would be appropriate, or the design studios that seem to hire a lot of illustrators, and send your materials to the art directors. Call a few magazines and try to set up appointments to meet with the art directors. Be sure to have postcards to leave behind. That is a good start and should give you a sense of if you and your work are ready.

You don't have to just create work one style, but you need to create a body of consistent work for each style you want to work in to convince someone that you are proficient worker and are fluent in your own visual language. Art directors need to know that if they hire you, they will get work of the same quality and tone as what is in your portfolio. There is not enough time in most cases for you to turn in something that doesn't work for them. They best way to prove to them that commissioning you will be a pleasant experience is to create many pieces in the same style, that tackle various concepts and challenges.

Illustration is not an easy line of work. It takes many years of hard work to do enough work to live off of illustration, and once successful it is still a fight to remain relevant. Perhaps, with your preference for working with different styles, you should pursue both graphic design and illustration. You will have many different opportunities open to you."


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Dear Jessica,

This is a general question with a very specific example. So, I dated this person, we're both artists. They were really good. They inspired and influenced my art, and still do. There was a real connection there, but it ended on bad terms. I was going through some bad things at the time, but to be honest I was immature, not ready for the relationship, and was pretty much a total jerk. Classic case of 'you don't know what you got till its gone'.

I can really say I'm not sure I will meet anyone who impacted me the same way. I mean, seriously. To make matters worse, we don't talk anymore. I don't know what they think of me (probably nothing good, but the mere fact that they refuse to talk makes me think I impacted them in some way - for better or worse - i'm assuming worse).

I've heard that subsequent relationships are gone into in order to resolve some sort of conflict from previous relationships. I've dated since, and had one good fruitful relationship that even ended positively, but I still feel horrible and am filled with regret from the previous relationship. It has been a very long time and I still haven't been able to move on. I've done what I can to learn from the experience and become a better person, but the pain persists. Is there something, anything, I can do to resolve these emotions?

- Mourning and Melancholic


Dear Mourning and Melancholic,

This situation is a tough one, though it may be more common and the feelings more easily overcome than you currently think. In fact, I have gone through something similar myself in the not too distant past. Though I know my heart still isn't 100% recovered--I no longer suffer these feelings you are describing, when they once seemed as ubiquitous to me as water and air.

Awhile ago I was given some advice by someone a bit older and wiser than me re: feeling that you will never be as close to anyone again post any sort of intense relationship. She told me that though I may never meet someone exactly like my ex again, nor even relate to anyone quite in the same way--it was okay--and not necessarily a bad thing. For one: the past just doesn't disappear. It exists in space and time and the good times and the closeness you shared with this person will never disappear. It is special and distinct and different from any other thing you or they will share with another person. As for entering new relationships as an attempt to resolve old ones--I'm not sure if I buy into that theory. In my young life I've already been in a lot of relationships and while some may have vaguely informed others, they usually are concrete and very separate from one another. If anything I believe we, as humans, enter new relationships attempting to resolve some kind of conflict within ourselves, not our past lovers. I think the key then is focusing on yourself and learning to know what you need: both in yourself and in others. As a general rule it's good to not have too high expectations of others. I try to have none at all.. for anyone. That way, each communication/hangout/etc is a gift.

Speaking of communication: this person not talking to you is not something that will last forever. Even the most stubborn people give in eventually and even though you feel like its been such a long time--time is so relative. Someone once told me that to fully get over a person, it takes twice the amount of time apart as you were together. I don't know about your case, but with mine--that means four years. Now that is a long time. But its also not so very long at all. Not that you should mark it on your calendar or anything--you just have to force yourself to let go and not worry about it. Its the only thing you can do. That, or try to contact them in the most honest and open way you can and tell them you miss them. If it comes from a truly soft and earnest place the other person will understand and its nothing to be afraid of.

Thomas Pynchon

"Everybody gets told to write about what they know. The trouble with many of us is that at the earlier stages of life we think we know everything - or to put it more usefully, we are often unaware of the scope and structure of our ignorance. Ignorance is not just a blank space on a person's mental map. It has contours and coherence, and for all I know rules of operation as well. So as a corollary to writing about what we know, maybe we should add getting familiar with our ignorance, and the possibilities therein for ruining a good story."

Free Advice #5

Dear Jessica,

My only truly awful ex-boyfriend moved away last year. This week I'm in his new city, visiting friends and desperately avoiding running into him. However, somehow I ended up entangled with him again anyway...in the form of a new boy, who shares many of his faults. (Mind games, wishy-washiness, tender self-loathing, intimidating verbal dexterity/analysis.) Luckily new dude and I haven't gotten too deeply involved, and won't, but it freaks me out that I'm attracted to someone like this again.

There are nice, artsy, non-techy boys out there who like me and don't try to warp my brain. But I'm usually just not that into them. It's these wordy, noncommittal jerks who get me every time. Why, why, why? Why do people so often do the same bad thing over and over again? When we should know better???

JESSICA, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.

--Tangled and confused


Dear Tangled and confused,

Your woe is one I know very well. Though I am not personally attracted to the exact type of dangerous boy you describe--I have recently realized that all the people I fall for share some major similar traits, too. Not necessarily good ones, either.

First I think you need to examine inside yourself what attracts you to these people despite the seemingly obviously warning signs. Is it purely physical? Or.. (more likely) is there something you admire or perhaps even identify in him that is actually a part of you as well? Or (even more likely) are there positive things in him you see and are attracted to / maybe you are letting all the perceived negative things get in the way since you feel so hurt from your ex? I'm not saying you should ignore these alarms going off in your brain about the new guy, but you should try to at least give him the benefit of the doubt. If he turns out to be bad news over time--he's bad news, the end. I mean, if he is really bad, you will find out without having to get too close to him. Essentially you are already "onto him".

As for these other guys out there that are nice and artsy, etc: there is probably something about them you know you are inherently incompatible with--and that is okay. You are not incompatible with them because they are nice, but probably something else you failing to admit right now because of your frustration with the very attractive bad news guy. Also, while it is true that people often make the same mistakes over and over again, you realizing that you are itching to travel down a familiar road you know is potentially (and again, familiarly) undesirable is the first step to not making the same mistake again. Ultimately though, people do what they want, even though they say otherwise. Also, almost everyone I know does not know what they want re: some part of their life. No one has it all together, and this is okay! Just be honest with yourself and the people close to you and everything will turn out okay. Nothing is wrong with you!


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Since I only received one question this week.. I'm going to post a short list of my personal summer goals:

1. suck it up / be less sensitive
2. be stronger
3. know myself well enough to make decisions that are good for me (even and especially if they are hard)
4. learn how to cook
5. eat less sugar

Okay, until next week. Email me, don't be afraid! :)

Ye Rin Mok: Homes

Ye Rin Mok's new project documenting her friend's homes on her website is really great and wroth checking out. So far she has photographed three places, including pictures I've never seen before of mine taken last December. It also includes a super rare photo of my long hair (eep). The pics above are from my house (top) and Sun and Ava's house in LA (bottom).

old and new / mine and yours / etc

Free Advice #4

Dear Jessica,

Do you have any advice for a freshman going to Cooper next year?? I'm pretty blank on what to expect/look out for. Anything I need/don't need? 

Success to you, 
Brandon


Hi Brandon,

First--congrats! The most important thing to remember about Cooper (or really any art school), is that it is just art school. Don't get caught up in whatever hype you have heard and just try to treat it like you would anything else in your life. Just let yourself be open for any and all experiences (both academically and socially) that present themselves to you and you will be okay. Even though there may seem to be an overwhelming amount of work, Cooper kids work hard and play hard. Traditionally, we stay in our studios until midnight on a Saturday and migrate en masse to whatever house party is that weekend. Also it's good to remember that NYC is both small and vast. You will learn it quicker by staying open to things. Really, that is my only advice. Enjoy your time there.

Also (a side note): I personally never like to know too much about anything I am getting myself into..in life and in general. I think is is mostly because it forces me to have little or no expectations of a place, so essentially I cannot be disappointed. For example, the last two movies I really loved in the theaters, I knew absolutely nothing about beforehand. Those two movies were Star Trek and Wendy and Lucy: both amazing. Also, before I moved to Sweden in 2007, I refused to research anything about the town I was moving to. I knew it was small and slightly industrial, etc--but I made no effort to find out cool places beforehand. My boyfriend at the time actually researched it a lot more than I did. I think my logic at the time was "well, I'm going to be there for 6 months so I'll have enough time to figure it out there.." That same logic kind of applies to you, too, if I may: you have at least 4 years at Cooper to figure it out! :)


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Dear Jessica,

I used to be this really outgoing person when I was growing up. In fact, my report cards in elementary school used to read "great student, very enthusiastic, needs to stop being so chatty." I took acting classes, had lots of friends, and never second-guessed myself. As I've grown older, I have grown more and more insecure. Once the center of attention, I now find myself grasping frantically to even be on the outskirts of the crowd. I can't quite figure out when I lost my confidence, but I'd like to get it back. How can I make myself feel and get others to believe that I am truly a one-of-a-kind human being I know I am?

Desperately yours,
Small fish in a big New York pond


Dear small fish,

We come from very different places, but I think I know almost exactly how you feel. When I was growing up I was not shy per se, but I never had any friends. I moved around a lot and I was painfully too smart for my own good, hated authority, etc. I essentially didn't like people telling me they knew better than me because I was a kid. I had important thoughts and feelings, too. Yep, I was that kid.

However, as I got older, I lost more and more faith in myself--even though more and more opportunities opened up to me and good things were happening. I think its actually a really normal thing, especially for girls living New York. There are just so many people here its overwhelming, and thus so easy to compare yourself to others--which is a big no-no! You can't compare yourself to anyone but yourself and even then, only to what you have actually done and not insane expectations you have of yourself. Also, since there are so many people, its good to only surround yourself with people who lift you up and who you can share a mutually positive experience with. Its not only good to have people who make you feel good about yourself around you--its essential. Because, most likely, you do the same for them.

Also--I just realized this recently: but in the past I know I have been in really unhealthy co-dependent relationships where both parties rely on each other completely for their happiness. That is no good, either. While close friendships/relationships are important, it is also good to hang out with a wide variety of people and spend time alone for clarity. I know this seems daunting at first, but you always have more friends than you think. Call up a girl you had class with in college but haven't talked to in a year. Or message that friend of a friend you keep seeing around and like and ask them to see a movie or something. Everyone feels shy/insecure sometimes and hesitates to contact new people or people they haven't seen in awhile to hang out--mostly only out of either forgetfulness or nervousness. In reality, these other people will probably be really grateful you contacted them. And finally (this is a no-brainer): if you believe in yourself and know only for yourself that you are a special person with lots to offer the world--that is what you will be. You are special and have lots to offer. Don't let any one person/group of people make you feel otherwise.



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Dear Jessica,

Last week I weighted my cat Katzen and she's 6,6 kg, which means that she's only 400 g. away from being obese. What can I do to make her lose weight?

Elo


Hey Elo,

At first 6,6 kg did not sound so big--I did the metric conversion on Google and 6,6 kg is 14.5 lbs! Katzen! That is pretty big..

Honestly, the first thing that came to my mind is that maybe you are feeding her too much. And after some research online, I think that is pretty much it. I found some pretty good websites with lots and lots of information here and here. The first one is actually amazing because the author of the page is hilarious. For example, on the subject of overeating he writes: "Unless your dog or cat is sneaking into the fridge and making ham and cheese sandwiches late at night when no one is around, the only way they get to eat is when YOU place the food in front of them. " True story.

However, putting your cat on a diet can be dangerous--just like when humans go on diets. From the same website as the other quote, comes this one: "Cats do not mobilize fat reserves for energy very efficiently and, in fact, break down non-fatty body tissues for energy. This upsets the internal chemical factory and can lead to a very dangerous feline disorder called hepatic lipidosis. Never put a fat cat on a starvation diet, it might just put the entire factory out of business. (I’ve had occasion to relate this personal fact to my wife!)". This is very good advice. A sudden, drastic diet change is not good for any creature. Let's say you feed Katzen three to four meals a day and some treats--maybe you can make each meal slightly smaller (like 75% of the normal portion you feed her) and cut out the treats completely. Slow, gradual changes are good--it is both healthier for her and she will be less likely to pout/be sad over getting less food.


--

P.S. Congrats to Nick (another Cooper alum) on his first solo show in Paris! Have a great time and send me lots of pics, please!

Free Advice #3

Do you feel that art school has been essential to both your work and your life? Do you think you would have regretted not going? Do you think the expense was worth it? In your experiences do you believe that art school can be somewhat dogmatic? Have you seen different folks try to go to art school and fail there for some of the reasons I'm talking about? Or maybe because they simply weren't cut out for it?

I know it's all pretty much based around how someone feels and works personally, so I think that is what I am interested in. How you personally feel it has related to your art and to your life.


This is also a good/hard question. I came to the scary realization not too long ago that I was just in art school for eight years straight. I went to both a magnet art high school and art school for college. Its something that has been a very big part of my life whether I like it or not and its past the point of being able to change anything. In retrospect, art high school probably formed and affected me a tiny bit more than college--but that could be because of many reasons. Both were good in their own ways and both especially focused on being interdisciplinary which was really good for me personally. And while I think neither school I went to was particularly dogmatic as a whole, I think some some teachers can be. You have to look out for those everywhere. I think you could go to any school and if you choose your classes carefully, craft a fitting education for yourself.

Also, while I think its definitely true that some people do better in art school than others (and even though you want to remain anonymous)... I think you are so talented it would not hurt to at least apply to some schools and see how much money in scholarships/financial aid they could give you. It really doesn't hurt to try it out--and then say, if you get in and hate it/give up--then you can at least say you tried it. Be open though..or else its a lost cause! Openness is crucial.

However, if you have a project you know you want to make/a job you want to take you can always do that and apply to art school later. It's not going anywhere! People go to school so early in the US, which is pretty rare compared to the rest of the world. For instance, most people in Sweden do not start to apply to schools for their BFA until at least the age of 24--which is a far cry from 18. When I was studying abroad there when I was 20 all my peers were in their late 20s and early 30s!


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I work at yankees stadium. even though i'm not generally attracted to clean cut, white teeth, thick-necked, jocks hanging out with their stockbroker dads and drinking expensive beer and calling each other gay... I have found myself making eyes at these stereotypical beautiful lunkheads and want to even go home with one. I have also never had a one night stand in any capacity. Should these stupid thoroughbreds be the first to break my sleeping-with-a-stranger seal?



First, this question is amazing. Secondly--I'm totally not being condescending. In fact, I kind of know exactly how you feel. Physical attraction is such a weird thing and there are so many facets to it. I'm not going to pretend like I know them all, but there are a few things to take into consideration that might help you see these seemingly weird new feelings in a new light. First, I feel like its very normal for someone to be attracted to a person/people they are around constantly--i.e. at work. Secondly, there is a reason these people are stereotypically attractive whether we sensitive art-schooled people like to admit it or not! What that reason is--I have no clue. But, even I have found myself kissing someone and not caring if he likes Beat Happening, too, or that he actually has opinions on anything I'd ever want to talk to with anyone else in my life about! You also have to remember that no one is in a place to judge you for this attraction, either. Unless you are with someone else and that person is a sensitive, Beat Happening-liking boy.. then you shouldn't do it. It will hurt him extra hard and most likely he will say snarky, mean things about the normal guy you had the fling with.

The one night stand question is a whole other question completely, though. I've only had a few (very few) in my life I have to admit they were all pretty unsatisfying. I'm just not cut out for it. However, I think if you go into it with the mentality that one night is all it is--it will be easier. Hm. I don't know.. sex is weird, too. It has the power of making you feel attached to someone even if you don't really like them at all--and even if it isn't very good. Attraction is weird. Sex is weirder. And I, personally, can not do any more one night stands. All I can say is watch out for your heart, and if you are set on having a one night stand and you find one of these lunkheads beautiful: go for it.


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Dear Jessica,

I love photography, but something about my physical surroundings doesn't match the world that I would like to see, or the images that I'd like to take. What advice do you have for improving photography, and are there any cameras that you would recommend? Thanks so much.

n.s.


Dear n.s.,

This is a really good question. When I first moved to New York in 2004 I felt a lot like you say you are feeling. I felt so strange in my new surroundings and found it almost impossible to take a single "real" image of anything around me. In those days digital didn't count for me: "real" images = darkroom images. That said, I would literally shoot dozens of rolls of film in Texas during holidays or other special occasions and print almost entirely off those negatives back in New York. I did this for a year or more--but eventually I realized things needed to change--and they did.

First I realized that if there wasn't anything I would like to see around me--that I could make it. I had never really "set up" an image before and decided that it could not hurt to try. I also decided to try to use a camera I had never used before. I bought my Fuji 6x9 medium format in January of 2005 and just learning how to use it posed so many challenges. With medium format you have to think about each image more carefully: they are not only more difficult to take, but the film is expensive--my 6x9 would only get 9 images per roll of film! I also had it in my mind (a challenge) that I had to take a photo of New York.

So basically.. try making something to photograph if you don't see it around you, try a different camera, or just challenge yourself to shoot exactly what you are afraid is too boring/uninspiring.

P.S. This is what I came up with in 2005 with my 6x9 in New York:




P.P.S. All that analog stuff aside--I mostly shoot with digital now and I love it. I think it has a lot of merits and I think that any camera (even a cell phone) can make a strong image if you have it first in your mind or see it in front of you. The cameras I use the most:

Canon Digital Rebel XTi (digital)
Olympus OM-1 (35mm)
Fuji GSW 690 Professional 6x9 (medium format)

usernames

All my usernames 2000-2009

I want to make a longer video with lots of people doing this (maybe even with a nicer camera)--or perhaps would do an open call for people to make them with webcams. Would anyone be interested? Though it initially seems embarrassing to do--it was also fun and I think it would be really interesting to see a lot of these together.

Free Advice #2

Dear Jessica,

I would love to have a cat. But I will probably be moving a lot in the next few years, and not home much. It doesn't seem fair to the kitty. How much upheaval do you think cat can take before it is unhappy? Also, I have never had a cat before. And I'm afraid it will pee on things. How do you prevent that?
  
Love,
Kaela


Dear Kaela,

I love cats too.. and I actually do not have one at the present moment for the exact seem reason you seem to be hesitant about getting one. I'm not home a lot and would worry a lot about the cat's happiness in my absence. Sometimes I think that the best way to avoid this whole problem is to have two cats so they can keep each other company. However, I have also met happy cats in single-cat households where the people who inhabit it are busy and are not home a lot. Usually these cats have been single cats all their lives and are very active and/or have access to a backyard or a lot of space.

Also, as per the moving around a lot--I think it all depends on the cat. Some cats move easily and some do not. Usually it depends on how drastic the change is between spaces. For instance, if you move from a huge loft space where the cat can roam free to a tiny apartment--he is not going to be happy. However, if the old space and the new space are relatively the same in size / access to the wild (windows, backyards, etc) the cat should be fine--you will still be there to love him.

Finally--the peeing thing. I've never had cats with peeing problems! Though I did find this really good article (thank you Google). Its really informative and worth a read.


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dear jessica,

last year i graduated from art school and am finding it hard to keep myself motivated. it's ridiculous as i have have had great success since leaving university and have all i need to keep going (two great part-time jobs & the cheapest studio in the world, £3 a week!) i am pleased with the work i do, it's just takes a lot to get going. i just wondered if you have any motivational tips or mantras that spur you on? thanks!

rebecca


Hi Rebecca,

First--a studio for £3 a week! Amazing. Ahh.. your position is very similar to how I felt for almost a year after I graduated from university. I know you've probably heard this/know this, but it happens to everyone. School (at least in my experience) is this super fabricated special zone where students have to churn out work, critique it, then repeat the whole process over and over in a very short period of time. Its not real. Even in the big art galleries, established artists only have to have a major show every two years or so--and even then you know they have so many assistants actually fabricating the work for them. So.. when you think of it that way, time and that feeling that you aren't making enough work.. its all relative.

That said, there are a few things I always come back to when I feel stuck. A lot of them are simple visual exercises--but if even working in a sketchbook is too hard I would suggest that you read a book. Lately I've been reading a lot of fiction. Short stories at first and then when I got a bit more adventurous, I started reading novels. Also, its good to remember that making anything, however small or bad or whatever, is still making something.. and those things will eventually and effortlessly make something bigger given enough time. I know a lot of my work is "made" when I go back later and edit/curate/put things together that weren't together before. Time is as big a part of the artistic process as any--even though the Internet doesn't make it seem so sometimes.


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Hi jessica,

I am a student working on my final major project for illustration, I am currently working on a book which includes my illustrations, photography and typography based on the topic on individuality, focusing on the stranger and less obvious traits that makes us stand out.

I find you work really inspiring, and love how you work across such a wide range of medias and techniques, is this something that is important to you and your work? What do you find inspires you the most? And do you have any tips for a successful final major project!?

Thankyou very much for your time, I look forward to hearing from you!
Emily


Hey Emily,

Working in many techniques has always been important to me. Half of it is because I think some things or ideas work best in certain ways over others and its important for me to use the medium that works best for it.. the other half is maybe that I am not good at only doing one thing because I lose focus and want to do something else too easily. I get frustrated easily with things if they do not start off "right" and often it is because I am trying to do something using the wrong tools. For instance, maybe there is an image/idea in my mind and I want it to be a drawing so bad, but it works much better as a collage or even a photograph--or even as a collection of found images from Google posted to a blog, etc. And when I finally accept this, it makes sense that the image takes whatever form it does and eventually it works together seamlessly with other images in other forms because they ultimately share a similar feeling and have the same point or origin in my brain.

As for inspiration and tips for a good final project. Hm. A lot of things inspire me but I don't usually think about them or recognize them when they are happening. Small things and big things inspire me--the way light looks at a certain time of day when you are stepping out of a building, just the feeling of walking in a particular place and a particular time. Trying to remember dreams and hearing about other people's. Reading inspires me a lot and makes me think of things, too. And as for the project.. I wouldn't worry about it so much. It will all go by in a blur (at least that is always my experience) anyway. Just really spend some time on it and make sure you are happy with it--but don't stress/look at it too much or else you will drive yourself crazy. Take breaks when you need them and don't hesitate to ask a friend to look at it during its various stages. When I made a book for my final project in university it went through many drafts and changes and some really great people and a few teachers really helped me along the way. Its good to take advantage of that school community while you can--you might miss it when its gone, even if you don't think so now!


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HI JESSICA
WHAT DOES TRUE LOVE FEEL LIKE?
LOVE,
ARNA


Dear Arna,

The first thing that came into my mind was an image of lying in a bed on a Sunday morning fully clothed next to a person and feeling totally content. Feeling like there is nowhere you would rather be and nothing you would rather be doing. Just looking at someone and feeling like the rest of the world couldn't possibly imagine what this is like. Feeling like you are both on the same page and everything you are feeling is mutual. Feeling like you understand each other. However, this moment/this person is far away from me now--and only exists in memory. I think it was true love and if so, true love is definitely fleeting. Like normal love, true love can be taken for granted/forgotten/cause rifts between the people involved over petty boring things, etc. True love in the real world is dangerous.

The other thing that came to my mind is a quote from Douglas Coupland's Microserfs. The whole book is basically in diary-format and at one point the main character writes: "Heaven means feeling intimate forever". Sounds both amazing and impossible to me. If heaven is being intimate forever, maybe true love is that same intense intimacy but on a smaller time scale: anything between a minute, an afternoon, and a hundred years, basically. Because "true love" (at least in the traditional sense) depends on another person, it can't last forever. People change--including you.

Also: